Don’t wear beige, it might kill you!
At home with Sue Kreitzman
FOR: SEASONED ZINE
“Thank you, Mother Nature!” exclaims Sue Kreitzman. She’s talking about the menopause, remembering the start of her artistic journey 20 years ago. While correcting proofs for her 27th cookbook, she picked up a marker pen and started to draw. The result was a folk-art style mermaid. “I love mermaids,” she says. “They’re the perfect symbol for menopausal women; no more problems down there – freedom like you've never had before.
“I looked at the mermaid, and the mermaid looked at me,” recalls Kreitzman. “It was fantastic!” And that was it. “In that moment, I was no longer a cook. I became an artist.”
In the midst of a successful career as a food writer and television presenter, it was an unlikely metamorphosis for Kreitzman. At 58, she abandoned life as ‘The Queen of Slim Cuisine’ to follow an unorthodox path. “My agent decided I had completely lost my mind,” she says. “I never wrote another book.”
Kreitzman had always been obsessed with colour, but never dreamed she could pick up the paintbrush herself. “I was supposed to be good at everything,
according to my parents, and the only thing I ever failed at was art. I knew it didn't even pay to try.” Growing up in suburban New York, her childhood was a “beige existence”.
“My family weren't colourful at all, but my mother did drag me around the New York City museums,” she says. “Of course, she didn't want me to be an artist, she just wanted me to have culture.” Weekends spent trailing around galleries are the stuff of nightmares for most young critics, but not for Kreitzman. “The art spoke to me. It got into my head.”
After tense journeys into the city, where her mother would become bad-tempered at some point during the commute, Kreitzman found solace in the art. “I felt it was looking out for me.” Her favourites? The Metropolitan Museum’s tribal masks. “To me, they were real, and they were taking care of me.”
Now, Kreitzman’s East London home has become her own gallery of oddities; an explosion of vivid, clashing hues. Lined floor-to-ceiling with a kaleidoscopic array of trinkets, mannequins and sculptures, Kreitzman’s psychedelic interior style feels otherworldly. “I have an insatiable need for colour,” she explains. “It’s not pretentious, it’s not studied. I didn't decide that this was going to be my philosophy.” Kreitzman loves all colours, with one exception. “Beige is nothing. And it’s scary. Some people are frightened of spiders, some people are frightened of heights. I am frightened of beige. My motto is: don’t wear beige. It might kill you!”
Sitting comfortably in a red, 1960s style armchair, Kreitzman is surrounded by her assemblage art. Models of almost-human figures feature heavily, so she’s always surrounded by faces. “To me, they’re quite real. All of them are pieces of me.”
Kreitzman has been collecting since leaving suburbia in her late teens. “In the early days, I would go to flea markets and take home whatever I could afford to buy,” she says. Now, she uses these knick-knacks to create new works of sculpture. “Nothing ever goes to waste. Ever. You keep on reusing it until it finally rots.”
With so much to look at, some might consider Kreitzman’s home overwhelming. But that’s exactly how she likes it. “People explain how to live to me. They say ‘you need to have a quiet place, a calm room to rest your eyes.’ I say: “Why?” I love living in an art installation.”
Kreitzman’s flat is an eclectic cornucopia of artefacts from all over the world. Celebrating multicultural art, she encourages others to do the same. “If we didn't have cultural sharing, we would have no cuisine. We would have no music, no language, no slang. We’d be putting ourselves into ghettos. Why would we do that? We live in the most exciting world of cultures. There’s no reason not to share.”
She embellishes traditional Masai collars with her finds, turning them into ‘neck shrines’. “I’m obsessed with them,” she says, “but you have to be a dedicated person to wear one because they’re big and they’re strange. You have to be very committed.”
Kreitzman’s commitment to colour is evident in every aspect of her life, including her distinctive look. She designs kimonos, mixing clashing fabrics with her own artwork to create new textiles. Paired with ‘blinged-up’ Crocs and thick-framed red spectacles, it’s no wonder she’s garnered such a loyal following. “I want to bring colour to people,” she explains. “I want to bring art and I want to bring fun.”
With new technology, she’s now inspiring a whole demographic of visual artists. “I love Instagram. I’m an Instagram slut,” she laughs. “It’s just another way of sharing stories.” Pushing 20k followers, Kreitzman has become a cult celebrity. “I used to say that I was creating tribal art, [in] a tribe of one. Now, with the help of social media, I actually do have a tribe of other crazy people of all ages. It’s very satisfying. I inspire them and they inspire me.”
Approaching 80, how does Kreitzman feel about age-appropriate dressing? “There’s no such thing. If you don't have fun now, what are you going to do? Dress up for your funeral? Now is the time to do exactly what you want,” she exclaims.
“It’s a bad, sad, scary life and you never know when it’s going to be over, so for heaven’s sake, use your life and live it,” she asserts. “Dress for your body shape, dress for the weather, and then dress for what you love. Don't listen to any other rules.
“Counteract the awful people. Make a bubble of happiness, not just for yourself, but for other people as well,” she says. “It’s a complete, 100 percent immersive art life. That’s how I choose to spend my old age.” ︎